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405 Special: Olympians Interview Kutosis

405 Special: Olympians Interview Kutosis

by The 405 News Team, 20 April 2012

It's crunch time - literally. This Monday just gone, we put up the first part of an interview between Kutosis and Olympians, in which Kutosis brilliantly asked the alternative folkstars what their favourite sandwich was. We secretly hoped that Olympians would ask their friends what their favourite crisps were in return, and you can find out exactly what was asked in part two of this exclusive below!

And remember, the 9th May is the date you need to pencil in our teaming up with Barely Regal, which brings you Theo, Samoans, Kutosis and Olympians at a showcase at The Old Blue Last. Lovely jubbly.

You can find out more by heading to the event page here.



What music are you going to play in the van?

Toto & the good kind.

Were we to combine forces on the last night of tour to smash one song out as a combination-mega-double-band, which song would you choose?

'Africa' by Toto.

The last time we were in Cardiff we met a tramp that kept kissing her dog with tongues. As locals to the area, is this standard practice? Are we going to upset anybody if we don't do the same?

You don’t have to go out of your way to tongue a dog but if invited to do so, it would be a bit of a faux pas to say no.

Describe the power structure of Kutosis as a country.

France - We are heavily unionised, diplomatic in our decision making, enjoy eating rich foods, cycling and rely heavily on nuclear power.

If we are attacked by slobbering man mentals somewhere along the tour, which weapons would you each choose in order to protect our honour / faces?

Jim: A Chocolate Orange. I imagined the other day about the ultimate death scene where you could attack someone by hitting them around the head with a Chocolate Orange several times until they’re dead. On the final blow to the head the Chocolate Orange unwraps into its segments and I pick one up and say "It's not Terry's, it's mine." The other guy would have to be called Terry for it to work though. I’m gonna sell the idea to Tarantino for his next film.

Ian: I concur.

Ben: I concur.

We are big fans of making stupid merchandise that nobody really wants, if money was no issue, what would be the ultimate piece of Kutosis merchandise?

Life-size solid gold figurines of ourselves. They could be given out at the Grammies.

What is the best riff, like, ever? Can you play it?

Hold The Line by Toto. Not yet, but someday.*

Where are we going for dinner? Is it nice?

There’s a new Harvester opened in Cardiff recently. We’ve been dying to try it. It stinks from the outside though as if they haven’t cleaned the grease traps out, so it might not be that nice.

Any towns you're particularly looking forward to playing/dreadfully upset about having to visit?

There’s lots of places on this tour we haven’t visited before so we’re really excited about playing all over the place. Some might say WUFT**.

Do you have any exciting new songs to play on these dates?

Yeah – we’ve almost finished writing our second album that we’ll be recording in May and June with Rory Attwell so we’re hoping to try a few out live.

Who is going to be watering your plants and feeding your dog whilst you are away?

See answer to last question.

If you played so loudly at a show that you made a girl cry, would that be an achievement that made you want to high five each other, or something that made you feel guilty?

High fives. They might be tears of joy. Or maybe she just got dumped. Without singling the girl out in between songs and questioning why she was crying, we’d never know.

In the computer game of your lives, who would be the vocal actor saying your bits?

We’d go for a Geordie theme. Geoff from Byker Grove, Donna Air, Peter Beardsley, Gazza and Robson Greene*** – his narration over Extreme Fishing was remarkable.

What DVDs have you got to bring for the van?

DVDs? You clearly have not seen our tourbus. It’s purely travel Scrabble and Monopoly.

Out of all of your faces, whose face is the best?

According to Twitter, Jim’s face is the best.

What activities, if any, have you left for your girlfriends to complete whilst you're away?

Feeding the dog and watering the plants.



  • *We’re not being facetious – we genuinely like Toto.
  • **WUFT = Well Up For That.
  • ***We realize this is more than three people but they would each play different parts of our lives.

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