According to the entire world, Suicide Squad sucks. While Hollywood's acting elite formed a cool crew so likeable that they've spawned a thousand memes and Halloween goals for years to come, producers and screenwriters relied too heavily on the popularity of characters like The Joker and Harley Quinn to draw in a crowd and paid too little attention to the plot and overall sense of the thing. So what we've been left with is a steaming pile of superhero trash.

But what if things were different? What if the crew of misfits were so odd and deranged that the film had no other choice but to actually be good? Over here at The 405, we enlisted our own group of geniuses to form our own Suicide Squad with five specific categories (inspired by a recent Starters podcast):

- Fictional Tom Hanks character
- Celebrity Animal
- Hyped musician
- TV Host
- Early 90s rapper

Josh Brown

- Ray Peterson (The 'Burbs)
- Ikea Monkey
- Grimes
- Space Ghost (From Space Ghost: Coast to Coast)
- Shaquille O'Neal

Samantha O'Connor

- Replacing Hanks with Wilson from Castaway
- BoJack Horseman
- Lil Yachty
- Bob Barker
- Method Man

Robert Whitfield

- The kid from 'Big'
- Mr Peanutbutter
- Jai Paul
- Stephen Colbert (the character, not Stephen Colbert the real-life person)
- Common

Kieran Gosney

- That terrible writer character who throws the guy off the roof in Cloud Atlas
- Clyde (Every Which Way But Loose)
- Sia
- Ross Kemp
- Either one of Insane Clown Posse (Probably Violent J)

Zachary Evans

- Mr. White from ​That Thing You Do!​ (in the Viola Davis as Amanda Waller, organizational role)
- Pizza Rat
- Frank Ocean (with the superpower of invisibility)
- Bob Saget
- Willenium​-era Will Smith

Daniel Griffiths

- Tom Hanks in Castaway
- Batfink
- Frank Ocean
- Simon Amstell
- Marky Mark

Siamak Amini

- Whoever he's supposed to be in that Carly Rae Jepsen video
- Dogtanian
- Drake
- Pat Sharp
- MC Hammer

Ian Hays

- Woody (Toy Story)
- Harambe
- Grimes
- Alex Trebek
- Coolio


- Jimmy Dugan (A League of Their Own)
- This cat
- Ariana Grande
- Oprah
- Vanilla Ice

​Alex Kozobolis

- Forrest Gump
- Eddie (the dog from Frasier)
- Lady Leshurr
- Bruce Forsyth
- KRS One

Mathew Parri Thomas

- Detective Pep Streebek (Dragnet)
- Keyboard Cat
- Frank Ocean
- Richard Madeley
- Everlast (of House of Pain ​ ame)