It can get a bit monotonous blabbering on about what people should buy so on Thursdays I am going to talk about what we shouldn't buy. We live in a world where you can buy mental health costumes and gay best friends along with your bread and milk and 'Be Reem' Only Way is Essex Perfume - does it have the digestive biscuit aroma of fake tan? How often do you see something in the shop and think to yourself who's buying this guff? Sometimes a bottle of 'One Dimension' shower gel found in a pound shop can make you smile but there are times when you want find the person who designed a product and just shake them until they stop trying to be 'creative' and become a health and safety manager instead.

I have just witnessed so many dazzling pink bloated monstrosities that my heart's a shrivelled wreck rocking back and to, clutching its knees and repeatedly whispering 'please no make it stop'. What could be so horrible? Glamorous Uggs, them what. Glamorizing Uggs is like putting swaroski crystals on a turd. Uggs are essentially slippers that make legs look wide and people waddle like a duck that's just been anally probed. As for the 'they're so comfortable' excuse, so is being naked but we don't go out with the crown jewels on display. Maybe people should be arrested for wearing these...

Regular Uggs are slightly forgivable when used as something to schlep around in but at what point do they need to be glammed up. I saw a pair of Uggs at London Fashion Week recently and I blame the person behind this fluffy feather wafting sequin exploding masses of pink jewel encrusted (yet still comfy) absurdity. In a nutshell, they are NOT and never will be glamorous. Type glamorous Ugg into google, go on I dare you...