Hello Chance,

First and foremost, I am sorry. It seems my negligence has led us down this path, one full of ill-fated Beiber performances and work alongside sitcom writer slash actor, Donald Glover. Instead of holing up with Jamie xx at BBC One, and spending loads of time brainstorming the fictional Simon Tallywhacker character and backstory, I should have been there for you. Our Burial bit may have slain (you had to be there, I think) but at what cost? To learn of your condition after spending hours on a Mystikal remix literally nobody asked for really hit home for me.

I'll admit I've felt a distance between us since your collaboration with mediocre IT specialist, and former From First to Last screeching frontbaby, Skrillex, but I want to save this. Remember cruising through the countryside, how you couldn't even put your damned iPhone away? I do, but it feels like forever ago. Sure, I miss Chance The Rapper, and Chance The Singer, but the person I miss most is Chance The Friend.

I know we exchanged some heated words a few months ago, but let's put that behind us. Yes, your idol name-dropped me as his favorite artist on several separate occasions, but it doesn't matter. Okay, so maybe he and I have been emailing ideas back-and-forth, but I only respond to make sure Justin Vernon is still alive. Lord knows he's been living in a human-sized birdcage in G.O.O.D. Music HQ since 2009.

My point is that we shouldn't squabble over petty things. I want to make the album we set out to make, one where you can boisterously holler over some Erykah Badu samples, which are nearly unrecognizable due to my "engineering", and we can try our best at snagging a BNM. Who're we event competing against right now, Run The Jewels a.k.a. the literal grandfathers of rap? C'mon, bro, we're still sexy-cool and "with it". I'll even try to finesse a Tallywhacker original up in this piece. If you agree to these terms, meet me onstage during my set at Glastonbury. We can run through a few new ones and, afterwards, you can introduce me to SZA because I have a plan.

Anyway, I really should wrap this up as I've traded Airhead's note-taking services for my help on his next LP and, though he can very well hear me, I am not planning to make good on this promise and, therefore, cannot stop laughing. We're both wishing you a speedy, successful recovery, Chance.



P.S. A fellow called Vic Mensa has moved into your room and is claiming you're aware, and are paying for his room, board, and something he calls "a business casual bucket hat" (he says you'll know what that means). Why does he speak as if he's suffering from tinnitus?

What do you think will happen next? Where will they end up? Answers soon (head here for part one). Illustrations by Emma Mc Morrow.