Marika Hackman just wrapped up her UK tour last night, and how do you stay busy as you move from city to city? You read top 10 lists. She's clearly read a lot of them, enough to compile her own top 10 list of top 10 lists for us, only a true fan could mimic such a beautiful art form with such grace. There are some deep cuts on this thing, so get ready to click and scroll.

Marika Hackman releases her new EP, Deaf Heat, via Dirty Hit Records on April 14th.


10. The 10 Greatest Boardgames You Haven't Played This Year

Don't worry guys, it's only March.


9. The 10 Greatest Sales People Of All Time

Unfortunately you have to become a member to be able to view this one, and I don't want to see it that badly. Honourable mention for being one of the most potentially exciting lists I'll not see though. If anyone does log in then feel free to email it to me and we can make this top-secret-cult-list go viral.


8. The 10 Greatest Roads Around The World

This one's a bit tricky as there are no pictures, so they could be lying. I guess we'll just have to trust them.


7. The 10 Greatest Lists In The History Of Western Civilisation

This is all getting a bit Inception-ey, I feel like we've reached the bit where its' all cold and something needs to get blown up. I'm surprised that we're not featured though.


6. The 10 Greatest Threats Facing The World In 2014

A bit doom and gloom, but it sounded quite impressive. Actually I've just read it and the threats are pretty boring.


5. The 10 Greatest Crisps Of All Time Ever

Ever.


4. The 10 Greatest Books For Traumatising Children

Any list which includes a book called 'Latawnya, the naughty horse, learns to say NO to drugs' deserves to feature here. It's also a pretty handy list if your kids are assholes.


3. The 10 Greatest Dads In Film

Some of them have pretty dubious parenting skills but I'm guessing that wasn't the Telegraph's primary line of thought when it came to composing this list. Shout out to all the on screen mums though. You'll have your time one day.


2. The 10 Greatest Chess Games Of The 20th Century

I know, I know, whats the point in making a list when we all know who's going to be on it, but that Bottvinnik Vs Capablanca was a real corker.


1. The 10 Greatest Horse Performances In Movie History

I don't think I really have to explain myself here. Finally an opportunity to reflect upon the brilliance of the Robert De Niros and Meryl Streeps of the equestrian world. Hot tip; the comments section is where you will find the real party.