It was mere months ago that Kanye West declared vague plans for the presidency. In the months since, particularly the last couple, Kanye has made clear that he should not be president. Kanye should probably take a long vacation, nap occasionally, and try to drink more water throughout the day. Kanye should just generally chill.

In his stead, what artist should follow Trump? Some options:

Killer Mike - Populist Stumper

Killer Mike

Votes For: Killer Mike's work has always displayed a sharp political mind, but his passionate support for Bernie Sanders solidified that his lyrical smarts translate to the podium. He even started an impressive movement to get people to invest in local black-owned banks. Also, he has the perfect running mate in his Run the Jewels partner El-P.

Votes Against: His raps are confrontational and his tweets are even more so. After Trump, I don't think the country will have the patience for another president who wages wars with Twitter eggs.

The Verdict: Runs an unsuccessful third-party primary campaign that results in the angriest RTJ album to date.


Pusha T - Business Tycoon

Pusha T

Votes For: In a genre full of charismatic individuals, Pusha is consistently one of the coolest people around. He's also proven his business savvy as the head of GOOD Music, as well as the songs where he brags about dealing drugs, which is literally every song he has ever made ever.

Votes Against: Pusha T came up with the "I lovin' it" jingle for McDonald's, a fact so amazing that it nearly salvaged 2016 for me on its own. I think about it whenever I feel down, and I smile a little bit. I am very much lovin' it. That being said, Pusha's corporate ties disqualify him from being the president we need. We as a nation simply cannot have Big Burger taking over the Oval Office.

The Verdict: Strong Democratic primary run ends due to corporate shilling and unrepentant drug dealing. :/


Pitbull - Global Ambassador

Pitbull

Votes For: His (self-given?) nickname is Mr. Worldwide. He also has the most sunshiny and inspirational Twitter account I've ever seen. The world will join hands and cry out, "Dale!" Peace reigns.

Votes Against: He's probably still wary of popular voting systems after that one Walmart sweepstakes where Internet trolls sent him to perform in Kodiak, Alaska. Poor guy.

The Verdict: Despite popularity, decides not to run.


The Knowles Sisters - Consensus Builders

Knowles

Votes For: Few things unite the country like the belief that Beyoncé is basically perfect. And Solange can play the pugnacious Biden to Beyoncé's cool Obama, i.e. when she kicked Jay Z in the elevator.

Votes Against: Speaking of Jay Z, he sort of seems like he could play the Bill Clinton role to Beyoncé's Hillary (sorry for mixing presidential comparisons). He's on the downside of his career, and has taken some embarrassing Ls lately; he's implicitly disparaged throughout Lemonade, and it seems like TIDAL's going to collapse any day. And I still don't really get what TIDAL is, so there's that.

The Verdict: Bey's run to the White House falls apart after Jay stumbles on the campaign trail and Solange stops speaking to him.


One of the white guys who does EDM - White Guys

White Guys

Votes For: Calvin Harris, the Chainsmokers, Porter Robinson, Dillon Francis... I am told these young men make wildly popular EDM music. I also could not possibly hope to pick them out of a lineup, but they are all inoffensively handsome and wealthy white men and I think this will serve them well should any of them want to run for president.

Votes Against: It's a serious possibility that all these guy are the same person, I have no idea. I don't know if the general public will be able to remember their names long enough to cast a vote for them.

The Verdict: They're rich white guys who DJ for a living. Even if they lose, they're winning.


Also Receiving Votes

Ty Dolla $ign : Campaign ends in scandal after Ty literally has sex with everyone.

Young Thug - fails to outline policy clearly because no one knows what he's saying.

Jack White: Tries unsuccessfully to announce his candidacy using only pamphlets and record players because it's "more authentic."

Taylor Swift: Refuses to run after Congress unites in a rare moment of bipartisanship to deport Lena Dunham.

Mitski: Her music is smart and her tweets are so wise and give me life, but she's too good for the White House. I just added her here to tell you to follow @mitskileaks.

Jaden Smith: Disqualified after it's revealed he's not from the United States, or Earth.