Film: Alien Trespass Director: R.W. Goodwin Link: IMDB Runtime: 90 mins I am really on the fence when it comes to my thoughts on director R.W. Goodwin’s “Alien Trespass.” Even as I sit here and write this review, I do not know what my final star rating for the film will be. Whenever I leave the theater, I almost always know exactly how I feel about a movie, but in this instance I am extremely indecisive. One on hand, there’s no question the former director of the television series “The X-Files” poured his heart and soul into the quirky “Alien Trespass,” a well-constructed and faithful homage to the 1950s science fiction films that focused on extraterrestrial invasions and played on the world’s fears of a nuclear Armageddon. You know, the same ones that are also inadvertently funny with their wooden performances, campy dialogue, cheesy and outdated special effects, eerie music and space beings that wear rubber suits. But on the other hand, once those warm, fuzzy feelings of nostalgia start to wear off (and they did for me about half-way through), all you are left with is a tedious movie that is full of wooden performances, campy dialogue, cheesy and outdated special effects, eerie music and space beings in rubber suits. Following a brief “News from Around the World” segment that playfully shows various fictional happenings of 1957, “Alien Trespass” begins on one particular night in California’s Mojave Desert where a flying saucer has crashed into the side of a butte. The bright light that whizzes through the sky is thought to be part of a meteor shower by many, but the explanation doesn’t sit quite right with local astronomer Ted Lewis (Eric McCormack of TV’s “Will and Grace”), who eventually eludes his lustful wife (Jody Thompson) to investigate the crash site up close and personal. When Ted gets to his destination point, his body is taken over by a Gort-like alien named Urp who is trying to retrieve the Ghota, a one-eyed space monster with tentacles that escaped from the ship when it crashed. And it doesn’t take too long before the Ghota starts to wreak havoc on the town by taking its human victims and turning them into puddles that resemble a mixture of mud and vomit. With precious time to spare, Urp and local waitress Tammy (Jenni Baird) must stop the Ghota before it can multiply exponentially and take over the world, a task made even more difficult because of some resistance from police chief Dawson (Dan Lauria, who played Fred Savage’s father in “The Wonder Years”) and officer Vernon (Robert Patrick, the shape-shifting T-1000 in “Terminator 2”). Now, if I were to judge “Alien Trespass” solely on Goodwin and screenwriter Steven P. Fisher’s ability to recreate a version of those old B movies about little green men, then I would be singing nothing but praise. However, times have definitely changed and what was entertaining 60 years ago will not get the same kind of reaction today. What made those old sci-fi films so scary was the fact that they were an allegory for the terrors that were going on in that time frame, but Goodwin doesn’t change anything to make it relevant for us as viewers right now. Sure, there are parts of “Alien Trespass” that are amusing and left me laughing, but I really can’t give you a single compelling reason why this movie should have been made. You can accomplish the same thing by watching films like “It Came from Outer Space,” “The Day the Earth Stood Still” or “The Blob,” and you don’t even have to leave your home to do so. (Plus, the oldies are much better.) There’s a good chance people who grew up watching these kind of movies will find “Alien Trespass” a lot more entertaining than I did, but I don’t think it will appeal too much to those outside of this niche audience. After all, if you don’t find any humor in the classic ’50s B films, then “Alien Trespass” is definitely not for you. Looking back on what I wrote in this review, I guess “Alien Trespass” wasn’t really for me either. Problem solved. Rating: 5/10